How I Learned to Stop Being a “Chill Girl” and Start Being Me

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The problem was that I was not chill. And I hated it. I yearned to be unburdened from the anxieties of caring and to revel in the magnetism of a breezy attitude. This cultural need to pathologize women who not only take the reins of their identity but also openly engage the full range of their feelings—you know, as a healthy human being tends to—remains a fraught battle as old as time. We are each so deliciously complex and messy; what better way to pay homage to these multiplicities than to feel, to express, and to carve out space to navigate as our purest self? So today and the days to come, I wish for a speedy death to the chill girl within all of us, a kiss of death to the malleable shell of ourselves surviving only on our socialized compulsion to people please. And a long and fruitful life to the woman who has patiently been waiting underneath. Yeah, that bitchy little nuisance is known as imposter syndrome. And I, as do you, deserve a seat at the table, flaws and all.

Men seem to feel no such anxiety. A lot of you guys constant seem over-chilled and staunchly committed en route for basketball shorts despite all sartorial assistance. But manchill stops with crushes after that with the movie The Dark Knight. Liking someone makes it significantly harder to calm down and avoid advent on too strong, no matter so as to on any given day, 80 percent of your texts are just the thumbs-up emoji.

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